Last night, the Buncombe County Commissioners approved the resolution begging for deregulation of the brewers’-grain-for-cattle industry. Whereas everybody would like some deregulation, this particular instance gained traction because (1) Representative Nathan Ramsey feeds his cattle with spent grain from the breweries, and (2) the brewsky schmoozers probably offered the feed as a subliminal deal sweetener somewhere down the line.

Mike Fryar argued on behalf of the resolution. He made it sound as if the combination of spent grain and silage smelled and tasted like the stuff of which pipedreams are made. On the flipside, not feeding animals the ambrosia from cow heaven, would mean brewers would gum up the wastewater system, imposing expensive repair bills and ecosystem disruptions.

Fryar did not state whether the clogging of the waterlines would be caused by all the flushed yummies or by all the humans scrambling down the pipes to get a taste.