Three wishes games are stupid. If I could have three wishes for local news stories right now, I will probably change my mind in a minute. But here are the wishes:

  1. Whenever anybody wishes to use the word “excited,” I would like them to stop what they are doing. These live wires never seem to de-excite. Anytime they hear about government excess, they cry excitement. They don’t scream or jump. They just say in a monotone they are really excited, which, decoded, means the matter at-hand is a progressive redistribution to something that gives people a false sense of Buddhism.
  2. I would like people to remember the 1970s, when ads would come on the TV begging for help for starving children. The pathetic little kids, mostly from Africa or India, would look like skeletons with big heads and bulging eyes and tummies. They’d be barefoot and wearing nothing but a loincloth. They often looked like they had lichens growing on them, and flies were always swarming. Today, we hear about the starving kids in Western North Carolina. Sometimes they are obese, but mostly they look healthy and well-dressed. We’re told parents need awareness of their need to have government feed their children. The following statement about what ouwer schools are is-posed to be doing sums it well:

    “There’s a lot of families that may not qualify for free and reduced lunch, might be 40 cents off of meeting that federal income level required, and it’s very expensive if they have several kids they have to buy lunch for, so a lot of times they’ll just pack,” said Allison Francis, director of the child nutrition program for Haywood County Schools. Haywood enrolled in the program last year, when it first became available.

  3. I would like people to stop believing others are supposed to be afraid of textiles, mere pieces of cloth. I’ll be an uncle’s monkey if I feel oppression and second-class citizenship because I walk past some lady in a green floral print, or a red rectangle with a blue X and some stars on it for that matter.