Economist Bill Peterson just sent me this great list of Jay Leno lines and I just had to share.
Jay Leno: I love when they say this [attorney firing business] is a
constitutional crisis. Oh, please. We haven’t used the Constitution in
years. … It is officially spring. Al Gore blamed the end of winter on
global
warming. … Al Gore returned to Congress. Everyone said Al Gore was
treated like a rock star. I think the rock star was Meat Loaf. … Al
Gore testifie
that if we act now, we can still save the planet. Well, the whole
planet excep
Florida. He’s still a little upset. … Hillary and Bill Clinton
appeare
together at a fundraiser in New York last weekend. They’re appearing
togethe
again this weekend. Bill wants to be there to support her campaign. She
wants Bill there because it’s Spring Break. … Former presidential
candidat
Tom Vilsack says he’s now officially endorsing Hillary Clinton. Well,
that
should put her over the top! Unless, of course, Walter Mondale comes
out for Dennis Kucinich—then it’s wide open again. … According to a
new poll
29 percent of U.S. households do not have Internet access and have
little
hope of getting it. You know what the technical name is for people with
no hope of Internet access? AOL customers. … There was a big scare at
th
John Edwards campaign headquarters. It was evacuated after a staff
membe
opened an envelope containing white powder. Turns out it was just some
o
John Edwards’ age-defying make-up base. … I guess in Al Gore’s office
the
found some white powder too. But that was just from his powdered doughnuts.
