Appropos of nothing, see the incredible (but true?) accounts of squirrel-on-human violence and thievery. A number of enterprising vendors have come up with some non-shotgun methods for dealing with especially persistent squirrels; the really viscious cases probably require something more fatal.
My favorite deterrents so far include mild electric shock, a variant of which can also be used to train cats who think they belong on your furniture.
Unless you’ve got a squirrel over 8 lbs., the cat version of the shock pad is contraindicated. But for mutant squirrels 8 lbs and up, you may need the cat product. At level three, these ‘Scatmats’ are enough to keep 15-35 lb. squirrels and others away from your bird feeders; they will also discourage family members from bunking on your sofa, rummaging through the early-purchase Christmas presents, or parking anywhere else the shocking reminders are placed.
Love or hate the rodent critters? In my case, it depends on whether they can possibly be blamed for the disappearance of my daughter’s iPod at school. It is true that her dorm window is an easy hop (for a squirrel) from a large overhanging oak outside the building. And sadly, she had left the said iPod unguarded on the day in question.
The market is great, but how many bags of bird seed retail for $200-$300? Clearly it’s time for the iPod-mounted electric-shock-delivering anti-thievery device. Time to take a lesson from the squirrels and the birds.
