You’d think the government would have more to worry about than the number of raisins in loaves of raisin bread. Nope, they don’t. For a view into the insanity that is the Food and Drug Administration’s nitpicking, brought to you by our wonderful Congress, of course, read this paragraph:

(b) The name of the food is “raisin bread”, “raisin rolls”,“raisin buns”, as applicable. When the food contains not less than 2.56 percent by weight of whole egg solids, the name of the food may be “raisin and egg bread”, “raisin and egg rolls”, or “raisin and egg buns”, as applicable, accompanied by the statement “Contains – medium-sized egg(s) per pound” in the manner prescribed by Sec. 102.5(c)(3) of this chapter, the blank to be filled in with the number which represents the whole egg content of the food expressed to the nearest one-fifth egg but not greater than the amount actually present. For purposes of this regulation, whole egg solids are the edible contents of eggs calculated on a moisture-free basis and exclusive of any nonegg solids which may be present in standardized and other commercial egg products. One medium-sized egg is equivalent to 0.41 ounce of whole egg solids.

And we used to laugh in the service when we saw a can in our C Rations that said something like “Bread, raisin, sliced.” By comparison, that’s golden prose.

(Link via MKHammer.)