Theme song to “The ‘Heels of Hazzard”

The Winston-Salem Journal wrote a pathetic editorial on UNC-Chapel Hill’s “derecognition” of the Christian men’s fraternity, Alpha Iota Omega, which included this line begging pity for the university that’s “just a public university trying to find its way through the shrill culture wars.”

Reading that, I couldn’t help noticing the similarity betwixt that and the theme song from a favorite show of my childhood, “The Dukes of Hazzard,” whose heroes were “Just’a good ol’ boys / Never meanin’ no harm.” Perhaps we could revise the ol’ Waylon Jennings standard to reflect the trials and travails of this poor public university. It could, we think, replace “[t]he broken record [that] plays on at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, with critics once again charging that the school’s administration is anti-Christian.”

The ‘Heels of Hazzard

Just’a good ol’ school
Never meanin’ no harm
Beats all you never heard
Been in trouble with the church
‘Cuz they want its reform

Makin’ their way
The only way Marx knew how
That’s just a little bit more
Than the law will allow

Yeeeee-haw!