I can’t help but think that if a Ten Commandments-posting judge (or any other government servant engaged with the public) just tweaked the wording a little bit, nobody would say a thing. After all, aren’t most employees allowed to post sayings on their desks and walls next to photos of their beloved?

Something like this would probably pass muster:

Words To Live By

1. Don’t worship something that doesn’t exist.

2. Don’t carve stuff dedicated to something that doesn’t exist.

3. Don’t cuss in God’s name.

4. Take Saturdays off and be pure that day.

5. Respect and obey your mom and dad.

6. Don’t kill people.

7. Don’t cheat on your spouse.

8. Don’t steal.

9. Don’t lie about other people.

10. Don’t long for other people’s stuff.

See? Getting rid of all the Olde English “Thou shalts” and “thys” makes it all the more acceptable. I’d like to see if the ACLU would argue that something like this should be removed — especially if you change the order, or don’t number them. Somebody test this!