This list courtesy of our friend Mary Katharine Ham:

Commence to Shooting

And other ways to enjoy your Bill of Rights Day (that’s today!). First, read the Bill of Rights here if you need a refresher.

Amendment I: In celebration of free speech and freedom of religion, read about how Fidel doesn’t cotton to either.

Amendment II:?Just shoot something!

Amendment III: Invite a soldier into your home to play a game of quarters.

Amendment IV: While playing quarters, listen to Warrant.

Amendment V: Watch Jeopardy. Twice

Amendment VI: Watch Court TV. Arrghh, Peterson overload.

Amendment VII: Hmmm, sue someone? Nah, maybe work on tort reform.

Amendment VIII: Get to know your local, friendly bail bondsman. My personal favorite is a guy in Athens, GA, whose slogan is “Where it’s always springtime.” I admire him strictly for his clever marketing, not for any personal experience with his services. I swear.

Amendment IX: Just put this one in an envelope and send it to the ACLU. Perhaps they’ll start defending this one.

Amendment X: And put this one in an envelope and send it to your Congressmen. They all need a reminder.

Happy Bill of Rights Day!

Reminder: Be sure to celebrate Bill of Rights Day soon, before some enterprising public-school administrator deems it unconstitutional …