Roy,
I demand a DNA test.
Although….come to think of it, yes, I remember Germany now. Daddy! I’m crying I’m so happy.
My
happiness is a mere shadow of what it could be though–car payments, a
new mortgage–the money issues are stressful. Dad, since you left
me, I’m sure you want to make it up to me. When calculating
allowance money that would have been paid to me had you not left me,
including interest, I’d expect a lump sum payment of at least $100,000
payable in cash deposited in my Swiss bank account: number
8675309. This is only fair.
I also want a pony, a puppy, a cell phone, a credit card, and a Playstation 3 (all the cool kids have one).
