A farmer was fined recently for keeping his cows in a dark barn at night. The Johnny-on-the-spot local officials noticed the bovine-imperiling low light levels when they visited the man’s farm to carry out tuberculosis tests:

While there, they asked where Mr Norcliffe intended to keep his cows in winter. When he said he would use a barn underneath his house, he was told it was unsuitable because it had little natural light, no electric lights and the doors were kept closed.

There were three follow-up visits but things did not improve.

Carol English, prosecuting, said: “He said the cattle were fine and he always kept them this way. He wouldn’t keep the doors open as it was too cold.”

Next, local officials plan to require relaxing ocean sounds to go with the appropriate lighting.