Durham County has announced its annual money-wasting effort called the Nonprofit Agency Funding Program. This is the program that funds a few worthy projects but mostly a lot of nonsensical boondoggles that have no business getting your hard-earned tax dollars. Still, it makes the county and its leaders feel like they’re doing something worthwhile. Does your group qualify? Probably. Here are the criteria:

The application and evaluation process for funding is driven by the applicant organization’s mission as it corresponds to Durham County’s mission:

The mission of Durham County Government is to enhance the quality of life for its citizens, by providing education, safety and security, health and human services, economic development, cultural and recreational resources.

That about covers the bases, doesn’t it. Education, safety, security, health, quality of life, economic development, culture and recreation. What won’t qualify? Not much. I remember an after-school program a few years ago run by an Afrocentric group that taught kids an alternate history that just boggled the mind in its inaccuracy. If that could get funding, anything can.